One of those internet/facebook/myspace memes : these are my real feelings that i didn't wanna post on facebook. too much info, sometimes.
1.) Typing 25 "random" things is wicked hard for me to do, oddly.
2.) I make random pop-culture/kid-culture/indian-culture references in conversation/thought. conversation if i trust that you will not laugh at me for thinking of the most absurd things & thoughts if i KNOW that you will make fun of me the minute i leave.
3.) I know random facts about lots of things just from my lifestyle, family, and excessive googling/wikipedia-reference clicking. (there has to be a verb-form of that somewhere)
4.) I am unduly a very open and self-confessed nerd. I love xkcd.com, but I'm embarrassed to say that even I don't understand randall munroe's jokes 100% of the time.
5.) confession: I had to look up the founder/creator of xkcd just now. [i knew it was something munroe!]
6.)I listen to lots of podcasts on my ipod. podcasts in which the co-hosts discuss various fare from science, harry potter, twilight, and assorted nerdy things. sometimes, i don't even listen to the content, and pop them on before i sleep to listen to their voices. weirdly calming. you have no idea.
7.) i have this fascination with wanting to know things, but then procrastinating on knowing them. Like, this morning, i wanted to study for this absurdly important contest in two weeks. but when it came down to doing it, i started reading thomas friedman, watching youtube, and reading mitadmissions.org blogs instead. hmmm.
8.) confession 2.0: i have an undeniable love for mit admission blogs. i don't know why. it's not just the school, which should be equally as amazing, but the writing, and the way that they integrate the weirdly nerdy aspects of their lives into the coolest things.
9.) i wish I could vlog. I wish I had a camera. I love cinema. I love freaky shots put together of action. i don't have a clue what the hell i'm talking about. but that doesn't matter. i wish i had a mac.
10.) um, i don't really like material possessions. i mean, i was never one to NOT accept like a toy or a stuffed animal or something, but as i grew up, i lost interest in those in favor of young adult fiction.
11.) my foray into ya as a 5th/6th grader kinda-sorta changed my outlook on life. i think i secretly harbored a desire to be the cool angsty kid who wrote poetry in a closet or something. somedays, i still want to be her whatever i wanted to be. something tells me i am, but in an unexpected way.
12.) I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE A PUBLISHED AUTHOR. and told absolutely not a soul, except my would-be published tell-all book of 1st and 2nd grade fame "Franklin Park Zoo". on the back cover, scrawled with the self-portrait of moi with an obscenely large head of hair and equally large shoes on my mickey-mouse feet, was something eloquent about THE AUTHOR!!!!!111!! :O)
13.) Confession 3.0: Mrs. Ford's 9th grade english class made me wish i never wanted to be a writer. true story. I wrote these ridiculously fluff-ridden fanfiction (explanation? later) stories about lily and james potter's love story at 13. and after starting mrs. ford's class, those went un-updated for about three years. oops!
14.) I, who have never been romantically entangled in anything or with anyone, attempted writing romance at 13. it was chaste at best. i look back on those days and laugh because though i am still as inept at writing those subjects, i am now more confident in my inability as i was in my ability back then. if that makes any sense.
15.) Confession: I cut out a few of these numbers because they felt TOO personal to be on facebook. "i feel like i'm naked in front of the crowd" is right... (1O points if you catch the reference!)
16.) On the interwebz: I used to feel guilty for writing in all lowercase, writing Lik3tHiZ, writing like THIS, and writing like This :) :) :). now i feel as though i've reached equilibrium. I break some rules like the capitalization of i's from time to time (okay, i'm the next e.e. cummings!) but i don't write fReAkY anymore. and i overcompensate my sarcarsm/humor/speech with overuse of emoticons. i can't help it! "see you tomorrow :) " looks so much more cheerful than the MORBID "see you tomorrow."
17.) Sometimes, I overanalyze things. I overanalyze friends. family. relationships with my peers/comrades/classmates? people that i know, talk to, but are not acquaintances or friends. and sometimes, that overanalysis is good (keeps me and others honest) and sometimes it comes off mean and self-involved. but hey, you can't blame someone who once had best friends who used her for math homework for feeling that way.
18.) one my pet peeves is the act of calling someone "Smaht." because they make it seem as though its a genetic trait. something lamarckian. something you can acquire over life, and pass down over generations. something unattainable. they put smart people both on the pedestal and through the toilet seat. it's a pet peeve because it's not something handed down. it can't be. if it was, little children would be spouting shakespearean insults instead of the ever-witty "You're Stupid!" and "You're STUPIDER!" you know that you can become smart by working hard. you know that, yet, you continue to simultaneously idolize and loathe those very people who have worked hard. that said, there are some genetic dispositions like memory and motivation that can greatly affect someone's smart quotient. but that doesn't mean that any random person on the street cannot be "SMAHT" at something. (to be continued? prolly an 84 related topic)
19.) i have a love/hate relationship with videogames. I love them a lot somedays lounging with my brother and somedays I hate them to the very core. that said, i'm picky about the games i do play. I love a party game like super smash, anything non-rpg/character based walkthroughy game on the Wii, rockband, ddr, and pokemon: the originals. i can't keep up with the 1000+ pokemon of the present, but the 150-300 originals from n-64 / game boy color were amazing. i used to be a poke-holic.
20.) if you know me at all, you know i dance. but you may or may not know my relationship with dance. i'm not one of those "OMG. DANCE IS MY LIFE!!! I Love to dance!!!!111!!! I breathe as a I pirouette" type girls. i dance for culture, i dance for fun, i dance to understand bits and pieces of myself and patch myself together. i dance to defy the boxes i've been placed into.
21.) my obsession with the brain is an overlayed and overplayed song. I cannot explain the depth of my reasoning for both loving and despising the three-pound enigma that rests on my shoulders. somedays, i hate the very reason why i like the brain so much. and somedays, i find renewed understanding. but one thing is for sure: I'm going to keep learning. because figuring out the brain for me, is like figuring out why the gods give everyone their lot. why we're here in the first place.
22.) i pretend to know philosophy. but the philosophy i know is all condensed to "sophie's world". i know my world philosophy to the extent at which i am content with where i stand. if i was to explain to someone, i would but stuck in a moment for an eternity. and then it wouldn't matter at all, would it?
23.) sidenote: i used to be irrevocably obsessed with jostein gaarder who wrote "sophies world". i read every book he wrote that was available at my local library consortium. i end up becoming obsessed with loads of writers. i still have a longing for andrew clements school-set novels which got me into trouble in the 5th grade. i am forever in awe at jo rowling. i loved gail carson levine. and now i'm on a john greene kick which will probably never end because his books make me really think. (plus the nerdfighters and the vlogbrothers vlogs are so awesome)
24.) i'm such a teacher's pet--except for when the teacher totally sucks. i can be the best student, and a teacher's worst nightmare. the reason why i build these weird friendships with teachers isn't because i'm a sneaky brownnoser with a hidden agenda. it's because i appreciate that they are human. they are people who may just be teaching between jobs. people who sacrifice loads to lecture and help "mold young minds" as dumb as that sounds. but sometimes, i get caught up in the heat of the subject and the literal teaching. and if that doesn't necessarily sync up with what i tell myself I KNOW, i can be a prick.
25.) I have a secret love affair with fashion. he pops into my closet from time to time, you know. it's on the downlow. somedays, i cannot be bothered. and somedays, i need to keep it cazh (cas as in casual). but other days, i am woefully overdressed for school or some other event. and that's totally okay with me. : )